The gift of giving yourself a tribe

My friend Cheryl Stephens tagged me in this image recently. 

Show yourself - Meme "Scientists invented a bracelet that gives a shock when the user uses curse words"  "Me"

Me and my ninja (Mandy Smiler) nearly die­­d laughing, because #truth 🤷🏼‍♀️

Cheryl is part of our tribe. Cheryl knows me well.

And you know how many times Cheryl and I have met in person?

Exactly once.

She’s well known in the world of plain language, and I followed and fan-girled over her for a few years, and we connected on LinkedIn eventually, then we met at a conference.


But she knows me so much better than how we could know each other from meeting that one time, because #socialmedia.

I consider her a friend, and she GETS ME.

Show yourself - #tribevibes - "All you need is that one ride or die homie"

The power of social media

I once got a job teaching at a French university because a plain language colleague on Twitter recommended me. We had never met. But she knew me, my work, and my reputation because of #socialmedia.

LinkedIn, the world of the #notfacebook, naysaying, professional police. I use LinkedIn however the fuck I want. And I have a solid tribe of other professionals who feel the same way. Police our LinkedIn use and tell us “it’s not Facebook” and we will block your ass – and not quietly.

My world is richer because this tribe of mine around the world will randomly tag me in shit:

  • @ShellyDaviesCom – this might be your soul sister
  • Hey @ShellyDaviesCom – wanna weigh in on this?
  • Don’t let @ShellyDaviesCom see this 🤣
Show yourself - #tribevibes

This brings me joy.

It’s not because I feel popular or well-liked.

It’s because people GET ME.

Building connections

And because they get me, I feel known. I feel connected. I feel a strong sense of belonging.

 And I have MADE THAT for myself.

You can, too.

But how? 

  1. You need to show yourself (authentically)
  2. You need to show yourself (knowing you’re not for everyone)
  3. You need to show yourself (without fear)
Show yourself - "Know yourself, love yourself, have power, find joy" - Shelly Davies

My ninja

I mentioned Mandy Smiler earlier and there’s a reason for that.

Almost 4 years ago I hired her as my Life Ninja – aka assistant. I thought I was hiring admin support, and I was. But together over these years we’ve discovered her absolute gift: she knows how to help people SHOW THEMSELVES TO THE WORLD.

To me she’ll always be known as Shelly’s Ninja, cos that’s how it all started (and yes, I’m still keeping her skills for myself too!) But now, as Ninja-Savvy Socials, her business is giving other people the gift she gave me – the ability to show yourself to the world.

Authentically, powerfully, in a way that attracts YOUR tribe.

Show yourself - @ninjasavvysocials

Attracting your tribe

Want to invite the right customers and surround yourself with likeminded people?

You should talk to her. See here for more about what she does.

Show yourself - "Just sitting here on the corner of bombdiggity and awesome, creating magic" - by @ninjasavvysocials

Yes, we all know social media can be noisy and destructive.

Show yourself - "I have a ton of followers, but I need help improving social media engagement."  "Just misspell something"

BUT if you make it work for you, it can be SO powerful and bring you joy.

Me? I choose #joy. (And #badassery. Of course!)

PSA: this post does not encourage nudity (unless that’s your thing)

ALSO PSA: Connection isn’t just a nice to have. It’s the proven solution to so much of the pain we have in the world today.